Handfasting Revisited

A handfasting, for the purpose of what I'm going to go on about today, is basically a Pagan wedding.  I talked a lot about handfasting in 2008 in Episode 60 and Episode 61 of The Firefly Chronicles Podcast. 

One of the most compelling abilities of eclectic Paganism is how we're able to mold and shape it around our lives.  We decide our personal purpose behind participating in a ritual, and we can craft rituals around important moments in our lives.  In American society, weddings are performed by an officiant, whether they are also legal contracts or not.  But, in Pagan religions, it is often perfectly acceptable to perform our own ceremonies, even those marking the most special times in our lives.

So, on the New Moon last night, Sean Bennett and I were handfasted.  We cast a circle and called the quarters in the general Order of Bards, Ovates, and Druids style.  We spoke of our intention, the things that brought us together, and the things that make us a strong team:

1. To live a shared life.
2. To lead a deeply spiritual life.
3. To share our happiness with others.
4. To be content and at peace together.
5. To build strength in the Pagan community.
6. To encourage other people to live their own best lives.
7. To live long and healthy lives.
8. To build a spiritual and loving family.
9. To explore the opportunity to start our own successful business.
10. To engage in charity throughout our lives.

We talked extensively about what these specific intentions really mean to us.  When it comes to leading a deeply spiritual life, I mentioned that this meant to me that we weren't just talking about what we'd like to do, but we needed to do it.  I used the example of our handfasting ritual.  We had known immediately after Samhain that we wanted to get married.  We set a date for a public ceremony in September 2012, and then planned to legalize it as soon as possible (likely January).  But, we already felt like we were married, and we wanted a way to solidify it or make it official.  Instead of just talking about it, we went ahead and handfasted ourselves.  This was something I often failed at in my own spiritual practice.  A lot of spiritual work was done every day in the in between moments that appeared in life.  I wasn't setting aside time to focus and do the work I wanted to do. 

We exchanged rings, talking about what these rings symbolize.  We used a magickal brick that Stella Maris made from David Salisbury's Witches' Lightning potion to write out a word that summarizes all of our intentions: Love.