B is for Blessed

We give blessings, ask for blessings, and proclaim something "blessed be." There are times when we feel especially blessed, and there are times when we don't feel so blessed.  My understanding of a blessed moment/situation/life is that one is smiled down or looked with favor upon by the Fates, the universe, the divine, the gods, fortune, or whatever force influences the juxtaposition of one's place within the human existence.  Whether or not we are blessed is an opinion of our relationship with the divine.  Though we infer the intention of the divine, we never truly know what the divine intended.  We don't really know if we are being smiled down upon by the gods.  One person can walk away from a bad situation feeling blessed, while another person can walk away from that exact same bad situation feeling not so blessed (or worse--cursed, or that there are forcing working against them).  The moral of my story is that we are all blessed if we just make a point to see the challenges, lessons, and gifts in every situation, even the bad ones.

It was our only free night to sit at home and relax this week. I had been in a hurry to pick up a quick dinner for two at the Whole Foods hot bar--when I lost my car keys.  My car was locked and parked on a city street at least 20 minutes from home.  I was carrying a bag full of groceries.  It was freezing outside.  My husband, who was at home waiting for dinner, got dressed and rushed to my location.  After a total of five trips around the store, street, and looking in the car, the keys where nowhere to be found.  It has one of those chips in it, so it would be $150 to $300 for the dealer to make a new key off the VIN number.  That after I broke my glasses two days before, the same day we got our little princess cat fixed.  Talk about expensive.  We called roadside assistance for a tow truck.  We sat in the store and ate our dinner together.  Then, we walked across the street to the bookstore to wait out the truck.  We both love books, but there is hardly any time to read with our busy schedules.  We mused about how we would love more time to read.  We waited back inside the grocery store for the tow truck, which we directed to my car around the side of the building.  I utterly freaked out when I saw my car keys dangling from the driver-side door.  In all likelihood, someone found them on the street, didn't know what to do with them, so they came back out to where they found them in hopes that the car they belonged to would be right there.  And, sure enough, it was.

When Sean was on his way to meet me at the store, I had started to get upset, but that quickly passed.  This experience of loosing my keys was a part of a challenge with a lesson.  I needed to slow down.  I needed to not get so worked up about food.  It was a part of a plan that involved me not getting home on time, because that is what needed to happen for whatever reason.  It was a part of a plan that really didn't involve me, but needed to put Sean, the tow truck driver, or the person who found my keys in that place.  It was a part of an experience that I had to have to gain knowledge for another challenge I would face in the future. It was the universe conspiring to give me and my husband a simple night out.  We took that date night with pleasure.  After a moment, I was no longer upset, because I was truly blessed. 

This post is a part of the Pagan Blog Project.  Check out #PaganBlogProject for a list of other articles for this week.

Move Even When It Hurts

Today, I'm thinking of the times when we tell ourselves that we hurt and we should take it easy.  I fell pretty hard on my bum a few weeks ago, and massive pain started echoing in my upper back last week.  Well, I was stretching every few days (attempting to stretch daily), I was trying to do the Five Tibetans from the Firefly Fitness class, and I was trying to keep up with my workout.  I was feeling all right until the two days I didn't stretch, do the Five Tibetans, or workout at all.  I felt horrible.  The pain in my back was astounding.  In fact, when I don't do the routines, my wrists start to ache over time, my knees start to ache over time, and I just start to feel old.  When I am continually stretching, working out, and moving, I look and feel so much better.

Firefly's Sean Bennett says something to the effect that we start to age when we stop moving.  That when we stop moving, we start to die. The routines that Sean does daily are important to him, because he says that we often don't move our muscles in these different ways.  He stretches daily, including his face and eye muscles.  I didn't realize until I joined in just how many muscles in our face we don't move on a regular basis!  Scrunch your whole face towards your nose for 8 seconds, and tell me that you don't feel places that were stagnant for awhile. Our muscles start to tense up, and when they do, that makes us look and feel old.  It doesn't matter if we're not good at it.  Over time, our muscles start to loosen up.  What is important is that we make a commitment to do something everyday. Combinations of working out, stretching, the Five Tibetans, yoga, massage, energy work/healing, and acupuncture, are all methods that he's commented to me help loosen the body up and keep us young. 

I really feel like if I make sure to keep up with the stretching, Five Tibetans, and working out routines that I will be able to heal my back more effectively.  It's sure a hell of a lot better than sitting here in constant pain like I was a few days ago.  Couple that with regular massage as well as visits to the chiropractor and I could likely find healing without mainstream medicine and drugs.  Now, that's a method that's consistent with my spiritual beliefs.

We don't have to choose to be old.  So, for this year, let's all make a commitment to movement, and through that movement, the reclaiming of our health and youthfulness.

So, a Virgo, a Libra, and a Leo all live together in one house...

I always feel the most comfortable at home when the house is in Virgo order.  I haven't cared in the past few years about the order of the house, because I wasn't flowing with life.  But, since moving into Chez Sean, my OCD Virgo living tendencies have come out of the woodwork in full swing.  I really believe that in understanding our personalities and other people's personalities formed by nature and nurture and communicating our needs, we can have better relationships with our partners and our roommates.

So, back to this notion of the house being in Virgo order...

That means that every speck of dirt that I see is either wiped clean or scolded for existing.  Couldn't that dirt have manifested outside?  I need to find the deities for cleanliness.  The laundry is done and soon to be put away.  It might be a little wrinkled, and I might be sitting on it while writing this blog, but it will still be perfect, because I did it.  The bed will be made just as soon as I hit publish.  The dishes from the two-course meal served to nine folks at the full Moon ritual last night are mostly finished and put away.  It only took three loads in the dishwasher and countless scrubbing.  The counter is spotless, and if anyone puts another glass on the sink (instead of in the dishwasher) within 10 minutes of my walking away, they will get a sigh and a dirty look as I put it in it's proper place.  This is Virgo order.  Everything is clean and everything has a place that it currently resides in.  There is perfection.  Total order.

But, that's not the nature of the Libran.  The house is in order for Libra when it is full of merry faces, each one of them sharing a wonderful plated meal.  Everyone has a drink in hand.  Conversation is jolly, and everyone is having a grand time. 

Then, there is our Leo roommate.  I was talking about Virgo and Libra house order, and we talked about what Leo order of the house would be.  She said that that house was in Leo order when she was in a velvet track suit and everyone was waiting on her hand and foot.  Yes, this is true to Leo form.

Being on the cusp of Leo, I am very social, so I love when the house is in Libran order. Our friends are happy and smiling when they are with us.  What helps me the most is that everyone in the house allows me to be OCD Virgo when I want to be. And, I do not expect the entire house to be OCD Virgo with me.  I was born with these tendencies, and as long as I use them in a productive way instead of a way that demeans and belittles people for not living up to my standards of perfection.  Don't worry, the Virgo is always the most critical about his/herself.

The point here being that our personal tendencies in our living situation can be highly influenced by our astrological signs.  This as well as by how we were nurtured, the way we developed, and our environment growing up.  Understanding how the energy of the planets affect us individually helps us understand why we act and react the way we do in various situations.  This can help us overcome problems that might stop us from having deeper relationships.

Saying Goodbye to the Firefly Covenstead

It's common for folks to move around before they truly settle down.  The places that we live become magical havens for our work.  They don't have to be just our physical homes, but can become our spiritual homes as well.  On Friday, my coven said goodbye to it's first spiritual home.  Even though I was clammering to move out of that apartment and into my new, amazing life, the coven was a little shocked that we were leaving our home.  It is probably something close to 50 rituals that we’ve held in that space. All in all, we hosted hundreds of events there. We've done so much bonding and made so much magick there.  Our forming and storming were done within those walls.  We made new friends and grew our family. 

The Firefly DC Pagan Meetup was formed October 19, 2007. It started out as a coffee chat. We held our first ritual on Friday, January 8, 2009 at the Cleveland Park Library, and then hopped around to area libraries doing lunar rituals for a few months.  I moved into an apartment in April of 2009 with the intention of holding rituals and events there for the Firefly DC Meetup and the Coven of the Spiral Moon.  Then, on May 8, 2009, we held the first ritual at the Firefly Covenstead---during the Flower Moon.  In July of 2009, the Coven of the Spiral Moon started holding closed lunar rituals, and the meetup transitioned to public sabbats with Lughnassadh. 

Now, it is time to norm.  We have grown up, and it’s time to leave the comforting nest.  To go into uncharted territory.  We’ve gone through coven grade school, and it’s time to go off to coven college.  It is time to challenge our relationships with one another to grow in an even more dynamic way.  We spoke about our favorite memories in that apartment.  Many of our favorite memories were little or big ordeals that we went through together and came out on the other side of together. 

Our intention Friday was to honor this rite of passage for our coven. To say goodbye to our first home and to embrace Firefly’s new home of the DC Pagan community center. We asked the divine to help us through this transition.  We read the original blessing from the Covenstead done in March of 2010, and then we released my old apartment of it's ties to our circle.

So mote it be.

Handfasting Revisited

A handfasting, for the purpose of what I'm going to go on about today, is basically a Pagan wedding.  I talked a lot about handfasting in 2008 in Episode 60 and Episode 61 of The Firefly Chronicles Podcast. 

One of the most compelling abilities of eclectic Paganism is how we're able to mold and shape it around our lives.  We decide our personal purpose behind participating in a ritual, and we can craft rituals around important moments in our lives.  In American society, weddings are performed by an officiant, whether they are also legal contracts or not.  But, in Pagan religions, it is often perfectly acceptable to perform our own ceremonies, even those marking the most special times in our lives.

So, on the New Moon last night, Sean Bennett and I were handfasted.  We cast a circle and called the quarters in the general Order of Bards, Ovates, and Druids style.  We spoke of our intention, the things that brought us together, and the things that make us a strong team:

1. To live a shared life.
2. To lead a deeply spiritual life.
3. To share our happiness with others.
4. To be content and at peace together.
5. To build strength in the Pagan community.
6. To encourage other people to live their own best lives.
7. To live long and healthy lives.
8. To build a spiritual and loving family.
9. To explore the opportunity to start our own successful business.
10. To engage in charity throughout our lives.

We talked extensively about what these specific intentions really mean to us.  When it comes to leading a deeply spiritual life, I mentioned that this meant to me that we weren't just talking about what we'd like to do, but we needed to do it.  I used the example of our handfasting ritual.  We had known immediately after Samhain that we wanted to get married.  We set a date for a public ceremony in September 2012, and then planned to legalize it as soon as possible (likely January).  But, we already felt like we were married, and we wanted a way to solidify it or make it official.  Instead of just talking about it, we went ahead and handfasted ourselves.  This was something I often failed at in my own spiritual practice.  A lot of spiritual work was done every day in the in between moments that appeared in life.  I wasn't setting aside time to focus and do the work I wanted to do. 

We exchanged rings, talking about what these rings symbolize.  We used a magickal brick that Stella Maris made from David Salisbury's Witches' Lightning potion to write out a word that summarizes all of our intentions: Love.